Real Beauty with FD
Real Beauty with FD
Season 4 Real Beauty with FD: From learning to love yourself, overcoming an eating disorder to being a natural entrepreneur - we talk about it all! Featuring Brianna Dunbar
Featuring Brianna Dunbar from @mombossinaustin and Host of @badassbasicbitch podcast
In the podcast we discuss @dibsbeauty specifically their Status Sticks - can't live without!
hit me up with comments @choosandfashiondoos
Welcome to this week's episode are the real beauty with FD. I appreciate you tuning in once again. As usual, we will be splitting this up into two episodes. I hope this works with your commute. I say that because my commute is normally 20 minutes. And at the moment the traffic in Houston is wild. And my commute has gone back up to like 45 minutes. So. Selfishly. I'm like, maybe I need to make these episodes longer, but anyway, I really hope you enjoy it. I appreciate the support as ever. And I just want to say that countdown is on until the last drastic part comes out on June 10th and yes, I am that person that's already booked tickets. The only one in the cinema. My t-shirts are ready to be the ultimate outfit for the evening. I'm a huge drastic Bart fan. So I feel like I've been waiting for this film. For ages, but now I'm like, They say, this is the last one. So what are we going to do? I don't know if I can wait another 20 years until they start remaking all the films. That anyway, I don't know if any of you are. A film. Goer or cinema gore, but it is literally the favorite thing for me to do. Um, I will go on my own. I'll go with people. I'll go with my husband. I don't care. And I will literally say yes to any film. So there you go. Any of my friends listening hit me up. I want to go to the cinema. Anyway. Enjoy. I hope everyone's having a great week and, um, keep on spreading that positivity. We need way more of it. So let's dive straight into the episode.
francene:I actually, um, not to go off topic, but, um, I was doing a podcast at the end of last year. And when it, cause you, I know you have a podcast too, which is great. Um, but when I listened to it back, for some reason, The lady's audio was perfect. Minds was like an alien. And I was like, oh my God, it was such a great interview. So I had to go back and re record my piece, which was so awkward. Like I was saying, trying to do it and everything she said, I was like, oh my God, I think this is the worst. You know, it's funny actually.
breana:I had a, such a similar experience where I finished a podcast recently and it was so good. And then my editor was like, Brita, I can't hear you at all, but I'm like lights. So he's like, just go back and listen and record. That's going to be
francene:super awkward. Yeah. It is horrible. And even like I was, um, I think my husband was away hunting that weekend. So I was really trying to like get in the zone of like everything she said. But even things like when I was laughing, I was like, oh,
breana:fake laugh, fake Laffer. That's why I always. Record on garage band as well. Okay, good to know. That's good to know. Yeah. But I hear you. Great. So no worries.
francene:Good, good. Well, Hey, thank you so much for joining me on my podcast. Real
breana:beauty with Ft.
francene:And place for we discuss what beauty means to us, whether it's a product that sells out every second around the world, or it's a cult classic to discussing body positive day to building incredible bank Browns. We are here to find your little black dress and skincare makeup. More importantly, promoting happiness within your own skin. Owning it. So this week I'm delighted to have Brianna here, who, oh my gosh, you have so many titles from being an influencer. I know you're based in Austin, to a career coach to scaling operations expert, a speaker serial entrepreneur, marketing professional. I mean, what is it that you don't do? And you have a great
breana:kid and you look amazing. Yeah. I I've actually been told that a lot that I have really great skin and here's my trend. Here's my chest. I just started wearing makeup like two years ago.
francene:No way. Oh my gosh. You never wore makeup before.
breana:No. Never cause I was a really big tomboy and I didn't know anything about makeup and about two, maybe three years ago after I had my third child and I was like, okay, I'm at that age where I feel like I, you know, need something and I just started wearing makeup. So this face really hasn't been through a lot of chemicals. Oh,
francene:that is the key then. Um, but seriously though, like it doesn't even look like you're aware of. A lot right now. I don't
breana:know. I don't wear a lot. So I, I do a lot of like the vitamin oil and then I have, um, I have super sensitive skin and I will like have allergic reactions. To a lot of products or I'll get eczema on those skin if I use something. And so I'm pretty basic, I think what is it called? Like the jar Giorgio, Armani, what's that called? That's how bad I am with makeup. I don't even know the names. Um, but my good friend and neighbor is a beauty influencer. Courtney, Sheila.
francene:Oh, my God. I love Courtney. Actually. I found out about you was through y'all's podcasts when she came on, but yes. Oh my God. She is great.
breana:She told me the foundation and I did that. And then I use dip. Yeah. So why use her dipsticks? Because she gave me a bunch and she showed me how to put it on. And I'm like obsessed. Yeah,
francene:me too. I think I've managed to get three of my girlfriends to buy the status sticks. Um, yeah. For everyone listening. And I think I spoke about it in the last podcast, but it's basically an amazing highlighter glow. You can put it on your body. Um, I use it kind of rounds, um, my eye area, but it is, oh my gosh. It is
breana:incredible. And I love it
francene:definers
breana:too. Yeah. So I just, I love it because it's super easy and it's really moisturizing. So the status stick, like. I, it does smell great. And so I just put that on and then for the status stick, I just take a little bit and make it a highlighter. Yeah. And then. Like a little bit of eyeshadow mascara, and that's it. I don't like put anything else on,
francene:oh my God. Will you definitely been taught by the baths? My
breana:fortunate, where I'd be like, uh, yeah, there's been lots of times. There's been lots of times I've gone and just randomly knocked on her door and turned her house and be like, I need something help me.
francene:Oh my gosh. Um, so I ask every single person I interviewed. Um, what does beauty mean to
breana:you? Yeah, so it's interesting because beauty to me. Definitely not anything on the outside. Um, at all, like it has nothing to do with your makeup or what you wear. Um, so something about me is I. Since I was a very young age, seven or eight, I started develop eating disorder. And so from age eight to 26, I had a variety of eating disorders from anorexia to blame Mia and blame Orencia and EDNOS. And I realized like I did not overcome all of that. Until I realized that like, I'm the only one who's going to love me and appreciate me and value me the way that I need those things. And that was around like 26 years old. And so I think that was the big waking up point for me of beauty is up here and here, like it has nothing to do with your great skin. Um, and so. Yeah. I just think it's everything that's inside us, your actions and your morals and who you are as a person.
francene:Ah, so how did, I mean, that is a long time and especially from an age, I mean, going through your early teens and then, you know, into that kind of early adult who'd, and then, you know, as we kind of grow older, especially, you know, it's kind of 28 that you form habits and like routines, how did you break that? I can't imagine how difficult that must have been and like your relationship with food. How, how is it now?
breana:I mean, I've been eating disorder behavior free for over a decade. Um, so, you know, th the thoughts come and go still, I'm a mom of three, and with that comes pregnancies and birthing and the aftermath of, of carrying a child. Um, and you know, you, you, you still have those thoughts, but I think when you. Develop, um, what is really needed inside that you're able to overcome those thoughts. And, um, I don't know, like it was very difficult to break and, and ultimately, like I had done a lot of therapy throughout those, um, You know, almost to eat two decades of eating disorder, that there was ups and downs. It wasn't like exactly two decades of eating. This are all the time, but there were moments, peaks, and valleys. And, um, I had done almost anything like inpatient outpatient day programs, um, at anything you can think of. I, I tried it and, um, to be honest, I had, uh, Uh, pretty big like awakening of, um, uh, trauma happened that made me realize that. Like, I can't rely on somebody to make me feel good or make me feel loved. It had to come within from me. And, um, when you develop an eating disorder and those thoughts at such a young age, like those are ingrained. And so at that age, Like, how do you fix those feelings? You fix this feelings by other people, helping you and fixing you, you know, to work through those emotions. And you, you depend, you can become codependent on that. And so at age 25, when I'm co-dependent on someone to help me feel good. Um, and then that person hurts me significantly or. Disappoint somebody or whatever it is. Um, it was just a huge wake-up call for me. And from that point on, I started to make the decision and choice of I have to do this for me and that's it. And so it was. Small choices every day that just led to bigger, um, like a bigger chain reaction towards recovery. Oh my
francene:gosh. Yeah, I can't, I can't even imagine. And how have you found, so obviously you said you're a mom of three. And I certainly never, I've never had an eating disorder. I've mixed relationship with food and you know, my body. Um, but since having my daughter, he will be four in April. It's changed the, the ways that. You know, speak about my body in front of her, you know, how we talk about food and not trying to get her to pick up some things like, oh, I feel so fat today. Or, oh, I look horrible and then stop or whatever we try and not speak like that. Do you find you're even more conscious in front of your kids? Totally.
breana:I can imagine. Yeah, totally. Like I'm very body positive and I don't comment. We don't talk about diets. We don't talk about bad food, good food. We don't label any of that. We talk about balance and nutrition, healthy options, and how some things can turn to be unhealthy. But for us like ice cream is. Unhealthy.
francene:Like, it's not a bad thing, but if you
breana:only eat ice cream, that's unhealthy. And these are the reasons why, and I try to bring a lot of, yeah, I've had to bring a lot of education and logic and science behind it, like very matter of fact, um, so that they don't get. Wrapped up into this ideology of good, bad treat, not treat, you know? So I try.
francene:Yeah. And it's, it's hard. I really try and, um, you know, read my husband. I mean, there's no parenting book, right. So we're forever thinking of, okay, how did we say that? And things like, oh, if you eat your dinner, you're going to get trait. And we're trying not to say that cause we don't want. Think, oh, dinner is not a trait. I have to eat this as fast as I can. So then I get something better or get something sweet, but it's so hard sometimes. Cause that's how we were brought up and you hear everyone saying things. So you're trying to kind of change that narrative, but, um, Yeah, it's difficult.
breana:Yeah. I mean, it's so hard and like, look, I'm not perfect. There are definitely times when I'm like, take four more bites and then you can have your ice cream or whatever. Like I am not perfect. Um, but more often than not, it's educational of you really want to give your body the nutrition. That it needs through the broccoli and pasta and the meat. And if you don't eat those and you choose only ice cream, you know, your body is going to have to work extra hard to grow, or, you know, your brain will have whatever it is. It's just educating them on the actual process of food.
francene:Yeah. Um, so going through all of that, I can imagine was extremely difficult. And you say up until the age of 28, how did you start getting into the business side of things? I mean, you've gone on to accomplish so much from your first start-up Zen content, um, to, you know, so much more and collaborating with fortune 100 companies. Where, where did this all start? And was it always in the marketing kind of social media
breana:side of things? Yeah. Um, if you ask my mother, I was always an entrepreneur. Um, she said my first business was around the age of five where I sold rocks painted box, and I love it. Apparently I made a sign and put it on our station wagon to call our phone number for their effort. Everyone's painted rocks. So people started calling. My mom was like, um, so I think the dry. Was always there. I grew up in a very humble upbringing. We were not, we did not have money. Um, my mom was a single mom of five for the majority of my life and money to me meant freedom. It meant in a sense like power and control. And, and although that can turn unhealthy, I saw. Uh, way out of what I grew up in and the surroundings that I had around me. And so I think I was always quite driven for that. Um, when I was 26, um, where I started gaining that confidence because, you know, I had this eating disorder until 25. I was always very confident person. I just hated myself and my body, but I was overly confident in like my capabilities, which is kind of, um, not typical for an eating disorder person. Um, and I was like very cocky and confident. Um, uh, I just secretly like did not like myself. Um, but anyhow, I, when I, when I was 25, I was working for this company and I found something I was super interested in and good at. And it was a content like they were, um, a company that was like a marketplace and I was running their. Enterprise services team for content creation. And I was like super good at it and its marketing and all of that. And I walked in one day after a year of being in there asking for a raise. And I wa I asked for a significant raise. Long story short, they gave me a raise, but it wasn't what I asked for. And I was like semi complacent with it. And then a couple months later they hired a male counterpart who they wanted me to train, so he could be my boss and I quit two weeks later. And I said, I can do this on my own. And that's how Zen content got started.
francene:Um, good for you. Yeah, just bitched about it and not being happy and just quietly kind of. Remains, but, um, no good for you for taking that stack and being like, I obviously have these capabilities and skillset I'm going to do it myself well, and it
breana:was really, it was, I wakening for me because I, myself was running almost$10 million a year in revenue for this company at 40% margin. So I'm like, you're making$4 million off me. And you bring this person then who, regardless of, if they're male or female are not capable of what I'm doing and you want them to be over me because I didn't at the time had management, um, experience on my resume and they did. Yeah. Even though I was managing clearly a ton of projects, thousands of freelancers, they just weren't in the office at the time. So it was the best thing that ever happened to me because I left and I was trying to do it on my own and the clients, a lot of the clients that were working with me realize that it wasn't the platform and the company that was making them. Project successful. It was the person and the person who had left. So they knocked on my door. And the first year I did over$3 million with them. Oh my gosh.
francene:Yeah. That's scary. How scary was it kind of that first day where you were like, okay, I'm going to quit. I'm going to do this. Even knowing where to stop.
breana:Well, something that's interesting about me. I think it's probably from my upbringing and like the chaotic upbringing is like, I survive in chaos. And so, which is like a special talents of mine. Um, and I knew that I was going to be fine. I knew cause like it was just my approach of how I approach life is like, I'm going to burn the bridge and like burn the boats as Cortez would say, and I'm not, there's going to be no way to go back. I can only succeed. And so it wasn't too scary. Now I had just gotten married. Um, my husband at the time had a decent salary. And so I'm like, what's the risk? You know, I go get another job in Silicon valley. I'm sure I'll find one if I'm not successful. Um, so it was like the perfect time.
francene:Cause you were, um, you were brought up in upstate New York, right? And then you moved over to California. That's. When, how long have you been in Austin?
breana:For, I moved into Austin 2017. So. Ah, nice.
francene:Um, so what advice would you give to others that are maybe in that similar situation? And, you know, obviously we've seen a lot of movements over the last couple of years with COVID and you know, a lot of people are reevaluating their worth and you know, their relationship with their companies. W, what would you kind of say to them? If they're like, I feel like I have this skill set. I should be going off and doing this myself too.
breana:Yeah. I think it's never a good time. Yeah. That's my advice. It's never a good time. It's never a good time. There's always going to be something there's going to be a wedding. There's going to be a vacation. There's going to be a baby. There's going to be. Oh a loss, you know, there's always going to be something in your way. There's always going to be a reason and you just have to do it, like set yourself up for success. Right? Like don't just pull the plug if you've got a lot of bills to play, pay and no savings. Yeah. But like, I find myself at this point right now to where my side company is paying me more than my salary at my job. And I'm like, Ooh, what do I do now? I'm in a little bit of a different position because I'm a mom of three I'm expecting, so there's going to be another baby
francene:on the way. Thank you. It's probably
breana:not a great time to like, go start up a whole nother company. Right? Like that actually might be a legitimate thing. Um, but when you're younger and the risks are a lot lower, just go for it because 10 years from now, when you look back, you're always going to wonder.
francene:Okay, so true. Yeah. It's true. You know, um, my. Dad's um, he very rarely gives kind of good advice, but I remember, um, we were talking about, you know, when me and my husband would have a baby and I remember saying to him the long list of, well, I want to be in a different position in my career. We want more money. Like we want to be established. My dad had said the same thing. He was like, it's never, ever going to be a good time. And it's true. Like, it
breana:was always something. Oh, it's more just
francene:the terrifying fear of kind of doing that next chapter, doing something that's a bit more foreign to you, um, and going out
breana:on your own, right? Yeah. I think the other thing too is like, as humans. We prefer to be comfortable. Yeah. Everybody wants to be comfortable. Right. Unless you're like me where you're like, I love chaos. My husband is so over right now. Like, can we just have some normalcy? Um, but I think everyone loves being comfortable. And the idea, even the idea of leaving your comfortable. Job and their income and all of that could, could to go do something that is it's like risky is super uncomfortable and it's like, we tend to make up excuses and reasons why we can't do it because we're so scared.
francene:Yeah. That's true. That's true. So do you think, um, you know, I'm part of. You being involved in these businesses and having that experience, I know you became a certified career coach. Was that kind of what led to that passion too, is helping others kind of pursue their dreams or looking at businesses. And I know in your blog
breana:you have a great
francene:list of, um, topics, um, you know, where you're helping kind of other business owners, but is that fine? Kind of went down that route.
breana:Yeah. I don't know why I did. I think, um, if you know anything about the Enneagram, I'm a three, which is the achiever. And then I wing out to a two, which is the helper. And I just like, I'm very passionate about women empowerment and supporting women. And I mean, obviously. My podcasts bad-ass basic, which is all only, only about women empowerment and support and tips and hearing stories of some bad ass women. Um, but the career coach thing, I, I realized that growing up for me in a career, I did not really have a mentor. I felt like I had a lot of people. I had what. Mentor who I really loved. She was my first boss and my first job ever. And, but like, you know, she was just like a normal, I looked back, she's a good normal boss, but still I felt so like, oh, you're, you're amazing. Um, and I like to this day, I'm still thirsty for a mentor, someone to help me and encourage me and feed me advice and, and help me navigate my past. And. I think that there are so many younger women that are also thirsty for that. Um, and like probably can't afford a$300 an hour career coach. And so I actually do mentor groups for. We have monthly happy hours. Um, and I've put a lot of women, I think over three dozen women through the process free like completely free, where we create cohorts and groups. And I do one on ones to mentor, mentor them. And as a cohort, we figure out their career path together and I am just really enjoying it. Like it fulfills. Yeah, that's
francene:amazing. And it's amazing to do that. And I think it also depends on, you know, different industries. Um, you know, you have kind of different people in those kinds of leadership roles. I'm in the energy industry. So Arland gas, and you know, me and my husband speak about this a lot. Like I have great mentors that are amazing. And that had been great. Like they supported me, like definitely assisted, but I really struggled to find female mentors who are also willing to give me that time and kind of help. And I. You know, to hear that you were doing something like that and you're giving your time for free is awesome. Um, cause I think that's what we should be doing. Like, absolutely.
breana:I don't
francene:know why we don't kind of help make it easier for other women, um, or kind of open up that door. So at least you can go to someone and, you know, speaking about advice or whatever is